Shore Society Tank // Align Leggings
If I am succeeding at one thing, I am inevitably failing at the other. Or at least life can sometimes feel that way, right? Yes, there are certainly brief moments where I feel like I am just kicking ass at everything, but as I’ve matured into my early thirties I’ve realized that working to be excellent at everything, all at once, is just not sustainable.
After months of deliberating, I decided to step away from teaching yoga. Perhaps it should seem like an easy decision since I was only teaching twice a week, but it’s something I talked about (and didn’t act on) for months. Why? My immediate reaction to resigning at my studio was guilt. Guilt that they wouldn’t be able to find another instructor to take my classes. Guilt that my loyal students would be disappointed. Not relief for myself and my schedule, just guilt that I would be letting down others down and somehow be a failure.
Align Leggings // Water Bottle
I’m an enneagram type 2 wing 3 – Although I’m certainly not an expert, it feels like the worst type to quit something. Once I start and commit to something, I strive to be the best and succeed. I’m an achievement-based human and ‘giving up’ doesn’t often feel like an option. But with a (happily) busy work schedule, this blog space, family, and maintaining healthy relationships with myself and others, I needed to recognize that stepping away from one thing wasn’t a failure. It was giving myself permission to breathe.
I’ve been working towards finding that elusive mental and physical life balance, where I don’t feel that my heart and mind are being pulled too hard in too many directions. I want to feel calm, grounded, clear-headed and motivated in the most important pieces of my life that I’m working on. I needed to create opportunities for my mind to rest.
If you’re on a journey to find better balance in your own life, I would urge you to acknowledge your present state – Take some time, journal, and really look at your current state of mind and how you are feeling physically. Be honest with yourself and the areas of your life that you’re neglecting. I was committing to so many other things, that I was neglecting my own fitness routine and not giving myself permission to unwind. Then, set goals and plan for your new routine. Just like accomplishing any other goal in your life, finding balance is often an exercise of examining and then overcoming habitual patterns.
Have a great Friday and weekend – Hope you can find and enjoy a moment of relaxation!
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